Procrastination

I wake up in the morning

With the day full of things to do

My brain swirling and listing

Like a bowl of vegan stew.

I lie back down in bed

Staring into space

Scratching my head

My brain is thinking

"its too nice in bed"

"stay here a bit longer"

"there's no rush!"

I agree and my brain goes hush.

I do the worst thing ever

I pick up my phone to check the time

I can get away with 15 minutes more here

My brain pops poppers with the greatest of cheer.

I check my emails

(that's work right?)

I check my texts

I check my sleep log

My heartrate

My steps

And fall into the procrastination fog.

I check who won the Oscars

How Arsenal played last night

"Will Leah marry me?"

See the light,

and we decide to flee.

I google serial killers form the true crime shows

"what are they doing now?"

"are they still in prison?"

"have they shown remorse?"

"or are they a psychopath?"

"a bully, a scumbag, a thug?"

"do they still think they are tough?"

"a big shot, still smug?"

I look at the things to buy on my Insta feed

My ADHD brain saying

"this is just what you need!"

I buy it with one click not thinking at all

Wasting my money on something so small

Will I use it at all?

My shot of dopamine hitting my brain

Putting me on a temporary plain.

I then move onto play a game

Playing with puzzles

Making my moves

Moving up levels which is my main aim

I get frustrated when I run out of lives

I hesitates on the in app purchases

"Do it!" Brain says

I agreed not to spend money on this

"So what?'

I click and spend more money

Forgetting my partner does not find this expense funny.

I check the time

Hours have flown by

I jump out of bed

Trying to get to the list in my head

I feel really bad for not finishing the tasks that mattered

I should've never gotten out of bed

My procrastination in tatters